Sunday, June 10, 2012

John Ottersbach is always right

Yesterday was a very weird day.  And all of the random occurrences led to one conclusion: never fight with John Ottersbach, he is always right (although I am sure Tracy will disagree).

 *Personal protection note* John I forbid you from using this as any sort of evidence during any fight with your wife or myself.  For everyone else, this is fair game.  *End protection*

The majority of yesterday was fairly normal.  Did my laundry, went to school for a while to do computer lessons with some kids, and caught up on some things using the school internet.  That is where the normalcy ended.  And I blame it all on John.  He and Tracy were at a kids' beauty contest in their village.  After realizing that all the kids used the same song to come out to, he was going a little nuts.  But he described the event as "more interesting than anything else in huks right now."  I mentioned that nothing really "interesting" happens in these small Botswana villages.  Every now and then there is a rare fluke, but nothing to really write home about.  At this point he reminded me of when I saw a python that had swallowed a goat.  Touche.  Also, by challenging him that nothing interesting ever happened I had begun the process commonly known as "foot in mouth syndrome."

I went to an event/party last night out at the government workers compound next to the Khutse Gate.  It was hosted by the park to raise money for toilets for the destitute in the village.  See, even parties are about toilets.  Hence my argument of nothing interesting happening.  *Side note* It is stunning how much Peace Corps volunteers can talk about toilets, pit latrines and poop.  I am going to make a fool of myself back in the states.  *End note*  Well the person who comes and picks me and one of the teachers up is not one of the Wildlife Officers.  Instead it is one of the Botswana Government SWAT team members (I didn't even know that existed here).  He started describing to me some of the SWAT training the government had sent him for in the states, which was interesting to hear (point for John).

The second point for John (and I might give him 5 points for this due to the weight of the incident) happened in the 5km ride to the gate from the village.  We ran into a truck that was going into the Game Reserve close to the gate.  Nothing odd there, people do it all the time.  One of the guys in the back of the truck was clearly drunk and was tailgating the moving vehicle (also happens a lot).  Well we stopped to talk to them (pass greetings and all that).  And that was when I learned from the teacher with me who the incredibly drunk man tailgating was.  The President of the main opposition party in Botswana.  If they win the next election he would be the next President of Botswana!  When I told John about that he joked that he was a "man of the people" considering how much people like to drink here (ok John you get 5 points for this one if only for that comment).

Third moment for John being right.  So we finally make it to the event.  And this is when I realize that the event is basically just food and then "let's all get really drunk."  Well I have never actually drank around anyone in my village before.  But last night I decided to say the hell with it and broke that rule.  I did not get drunk, but I wanted to show people it is possible to stop after just a few beers.  Thankfully I managed to avoid the Chibuku passing circle.  That is just nasty stuff.

So I bet you are wondering where drinking gets interesting.  Well, naturally since it was a Botswana party, a lot of bumping and grinding music was played.  Funny thing about the people in my village (well the few villagers and mostly government workers that went), they like to grind on each other...regardless of gender.  Many times during the night I got to see some very drunk government workers (including a few teachers) grind up on each other with no reservations.  I tried to avoid the dance floor, but due to an unfortunate bet with Mma Bafisi anytime she danced I had to.  Well I ended up getting grinded on at one point.  Anyone got a guess as to who from the village grinded on me?  Was it a female teacher?  Male teacher?  Nurse?  Wildlife office?  The answer is none of the above.  Drumroll please.....................................I was the recipient of grinding by the kgosi.  Yup.  The chief of the village.  So I am definitely giving John a point in his argument for that one.  Soon after that I decided I had enough of the party and caught a lift with Africa (yes that is his name) back to the village.

While this was mostly just a way to try and describe my strange day yesterday, I did decide to pay homage to John and his ability to prove me wrong without having to do anything himself.  Kudos John!

In unrelated news I broke out my 2nd blanket last night.

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